GABBAR KI CLASS- Part 3
(Curtain opens-
Classroom scene)
Jai
and Veeru dancing, Reshamia singing, Laloo eating tiffin , Sachin and Siddhu
playing cricket , Madam ji gesturing Mannu to Sit , mannu sitting… Stand ,
mannu standing.. Rancho taking selfies with everybody , Thakur standing and looking
at everybody ANGRILY (he is the monitor ) and Sambha sitting at the top of pile
of chairs or any other tall object and looking outside )
(Suddenly sound of Horse
tapping…}
SAMBHA ; GABBAR a gaya …
GABBAR a gaya… Everybody runs back !
GABBAR: ENTERS … with BELT in his hand.
EVERY
BODY sings GOOD MORNEEEEEEENG sAAAr .
GABBAR : Haan
Haan ! Good Morning . Goodmorning .Hain..@
Kya soch kar gaaye they. GABBAR Khusss hoga , toffiya dega kyun ! AKAL KE
KACHCHO …AAJA MAAJI SATAKLI !
Aree
ho Sambha! Bata to Zara ..Kitne sawaal main poocha karta tha rey har roz.. Hain
Hain !
(SAMBHA
thinking & Counting ) : Kitney Admi they.. Kya Soch ke Wapas Aa gaye.. Holi
Kab hai.. “Sir ,Poore Pachaas Hazaar”
GABBAR : “Haaan…50 -50 kos door jab koi
bachcha rota hai to Maan keht hai so ja BETA so ja nahi to GABBAR aa jayega
apne sawalo ke saath magar tum students mera naam poora mitti mein millai diye. ”
Say Sorry , Sorry Bol , Sorry Bol !
Everybody
: Sorry
Sir
GABBAR
: Ab theek hai , Haan ab thik hai ..
SIDDHU : “Oye Bahut khoob kaha ! Acha Guru wo nahi jo kewal kathin sawal pooche... balki wo hai jo kathin sawal hal bhi kare ! Thoko Taali "
GABBAR
: Hainnn.. (facing audience) mann to karta hai , isi ko thonk daalu !@
Now any question ..
LALU : “Can I ask you bun question sir ?”
GABBAR : “OH YEAH MAN CMON CMON !”
LALU : “If suppose kariye ekha trainwa in Bihar
is running at a speedwa of 50 km par haabaar (hour) , dhan (then) in how much timewa bheel (will) it trabhel from one stationwa to doosra stationwa
bheech (which) is 25 km abhay ?”
GABBAR could
n’t understand the question : “HAIN ..?”
MADAM JI : “He mean to
say that if a train is running at 50km/h in how much time will it travel from
one station to another which is 25 km away? (looking towards Lalu)My dear
friend it is AWAY ....not ABHAAYYY !”
Mannu : “Sahi kaha
madamji”
LALU : “Arey ! That is bhaat I am saying.. bheech is
25 km abhaaaaay ..“
GABBAR : “(Gabbar first thinks over the question
, scratches his head, makes lot of confused face and then gives up the thinking
)TUMNE SUNA ISNE KYA KAHA..SUNAA..! AB ISKA JAWAB DO !
JAY
: "main jawab
doonga ..jarur doonga par jao sabse pehle uss aadmi se pooch jisne mere report
card me likh diya " Not
Promoted" , Us aadmi se poocho
jisne mere ko ye DO -HEAD wala sikka diya, tab main tumhare har sawal ka jawab
doonga.."
GABBAR :"Haainn…ab
main unko kahan dhoondu?"
JAY : "To
fir main nahi doonga jawaab "
Veeru :(gets up angrily) “Do Head
wala sikka..Jay toone Dhoka diya … Maa Kasam , agar mujhe wo aadmi mil jaye
jisne wo sikka diya to…(and turns toward Thakur . Thakur gives him angry look. Veeru sits down back in fear )”
GABBAR : "Mannu, tum batao iska jawab ? “
Mannu : “ Is
jawab se jaida jaroori ye janna hai ki jo train chal rahi hai usme koyla kahan
se aya hai ! Kahin is koyle ke peeche kisi maafiya ka haath to nahi hai .
kyunki avaidh khanan ke karan humein uchit moolye nahi milta . aur vipaksh ye
jaan le ki paise ped pe nahi lagte hai !”
THAKUR :- Veeeeeru... Baith Jao !
GABBAR :- Gabbar :
Agar paise ped pe lagte to sare Bandar Ferrari pe ghoomte ..ha ha haaaa !
(All
laughs artificially at the bad joke )
Siddhu tum jawab do
!
SIDDHU :-Nobody can tell my dear, nobody can tell ! unless we know how much coal
is available , what's the weather report…the future is uncertain ,the past is
permanent, it’s the present which is in our hand, present is the key and ..
GABBAR : (Jumps with anger) SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP
..Main Pagal ho jaunga ]
Reshamia
, tum jawab dogey iska ?
RESHAMIA : “Dekhiye Laluji … aapka question
acha hai..!Lekin aapko apne expressions par kaam karne ki jaroorat hai . Baaki
main apne fans par chodta hoon. Vote for Lalooji !GABBAR:
Bahut Yaarana lagta hain…..Sachin tum do iska jawab ..
SACHIN: Hey koi bhi train lagatar 50 kaise
rakhegi ? Jab main ek match mein 50 banata tha to agle match mein jaldi out ho
jata tha. Jab main best batsman hoke performance maintain nahi rakh pata to ek
train kaise rakh sakti hai ??
Gabbar :Iski saja milegi
….VEERU”
VEERU : “ Ek Train is dauding at 50km/h …
Dauding ... Dauding ... Dauding..
Station se gaddi jab chooth jaati
hai to 1,2,3 ho jaati hai.. ”.
Maa Kasam, AGAR MUJHE WO AADMI MIL JAYE JISNE TRAIN BANAYA HAI TO..
THAKUR :- Veeeeeru... Baith Jao !
( GABBAR sees
Thakur for the first time)
(
GABBAR : “Are Thakur, abhi tak par rahe ho (He thinks something and then smiles)
“Jisko jawab pata hai wo
apna…wo apna.. hey hey HAATH UTHAAY..! Hey Hey HA HA ”
THAKUR : “GABBAR ,Tumhare sawal ka jawab dene ke
liye mujhe haatho ki jaroorat nahi hai. Uske liye to mere pair hi kaafi hai (
and raises his foot UP sitting on the chair )
GABBAR(becomes disappointed) : “OK Thakur , jawab do !”
THAKUR : “The train is moving at 50 km per hour.
Therefore to travel 50 km it needs 60 min. Hence to travel 25 km it needs 25 by
50 into 60 that is 30 min.”
GABBAR (surprized by Thakur's intelligence): “Yeh
Dimag mujhe de de Thakur”
THAKUR : “NAAAIII”
GABBAR: “Yeh
Dimag mujhe de de Thakur”
THAKUR : “NAAAIII”
GABBAR: “Yeh
Dimag mujhe de de Thakur”
THAKUR : “NAAAAAIIIII”
LALU : “ARE DHUT , dimaag
ka kya karoge jab salution hi wraang hai; the answer is 50 min”
SAMBHA : “Jara samjhaiye !”
LALU : “Dekhiye , humare Bihaaar mein , DO STATION KE BEECH MEIN BHI 2 BAAR
GAADI 10- 10 min ke liye RUKTI HAI”
(All hold their head)
RANCHO : “Thakur saab ! main aapko ek idea doon ?”
Thakur : Kya ?
Rancho : apne is dimaag ko …..OLX Mein BECH De !
Thakur : Veeru ..
(Veeru gets up and walks slowly towards Rancho, clenching his fist .
Rancho (sensing the trouble) –“All is Well, All is Well . “
suddenly starts shouting "Narrator ji bachao". The narrator comes running to his rescue .”THEHRO ! Hamara play kisi bhi prakar ka Hinsa ko badawa nahi deta. Chalo wapas !” and returns back
---
GABBAR
: "Bahut ho gaya
sawal – jawab. Ab baari hai Homework ki .."
(Everybody
looks at each other)
GABBAR:
Sachin you collect the copies
Sachin: Main kaise karoon. Mere haatho mein to
Tennis Elbow ki problem hai. Isliye mere physio ne bhaari saaman uthane ko mana
kiya hai"
GABBAR: “Koi
Baat nahi Koi Baat nahi bring your bat
& ball , lets play cricket”
(Sachin
comes happily)
Gabbar
catch hold of Sachin and rotates him vigourously
Sachin : “Ailla ! Ailla ….” And runs back to
his seat
Thakur : May I collect it …(looking towards his
hands) Mujhe koi Tennis Elbow ki problem nahi hai.
